The Haves and Have Nots

Back in March, Sweets turned EIGHT!  Can you believe it?!? 

She wanted to celebrate with a mermaid inspired party at our house.  I wanted to go someplace else where someone other than me would do all the work.

Guess who got their way?

It was a fun afternoon filled with friends, food and fun! 

I kept the girls busy with projects.  We made a beach in a jar.

And we painted our own tshirts.

And, of course, there were snacks (precounted out for correct carb amounts)!

 

And CAKE!

 

Sweets had a wonderful day with her friends!  One of the best parts, however, was when it was time to eat.  I simply announced, "Who ever needs to check her blood sugar, do it now!"  And not just one but THREE little girls ran for their kits. 

 

If you look close, you can see all three are checking their bg!

I went a little crazy counting carbs for everyone and making sure she was bolused for the correct amount!  In fact, I texted Meri later and said... "Lady... mad props.  I don't know how you do it!"

But what an incredible experience!  We are so fortunate that Sweets has friends with diabetes.  And even more so that they are the same age and in the same class!  I love that she has that feeling of "same". 

A few weeks later, she went to another birthday party.  This was for a friend who she has known since birth.  They aren't super close anymore but are definitely still friends.  She knows this girl's mom well.  But the difference in the parties was stark. 

This party was at an art studio.  Sweets was SOOOOO excited!  Knowing this mom like I do, I knew I could leave her for a bit and she would be fine.  I thought I might give Sweets some space and sit in the car until they were ready to eat.  The mom could text me when they were ready. 

Sweets was having NONE of this.  She wanted me to go in with her.  She wanted me to stay. 

I had no problem doing this.  Like I said, the other mom is a friend and I had no problem hanging out and talking.  But it worried me.... Why isn't she comfortable with me leaving?

She had a great time!  She, of course, knew the birthday girl as well as a girl from her class last year and one from her cheer squad.  But she seemed nervous when it was time to eat.  They had Peeps... something that is a rare treat for her.  Her eyes got big as she looked at me - silently asking if she could have one.  I said yes... it's a party.  Go for it!  She had that and Doritos and a hot pink cupcake!  Party food at it's finest!  She loved the painting.  But seemed a little uncomfortable the whole time.

I asked her about it later. 

"Why didn't you want me to leave, A?  You would be fine on your own for an hour or so." I said.

"I know.  I just wanted you there.  They don't know about diabetes."

"You'd be ok for an hour.  And I'd be right outside.  Birthday Girl's mom knows a little and can always text me.  And you know what you're doing.  You'd be fine!"

"Yeah.  It's just different if it's H's mom or K's mom." (Those are other T1 girls.)

It just made me aware of how different things can be.

Even seemingly little things like parties and play dates.  Which actually aren't that little when you're eight.

The Haves and the Have Nots. 

These are the things that we don't always think about.  Being the only one at a party with T1.  Having to test in front of people who don't know.  Figure out carbs.  And what if you go low?  It's stressful.  I can see how she would feel more comfortable with me there.

We are working on this.  I want to give her a little space.  I want her to feel comfortable. 

Baby steps. 

We will get there.

We're already well on our way... 

She just asked me, "Mom!  When can I go play at M's house?  Like by myself.  Without YOU there?!?"